So many times in my life have i stopped and looked at all that lies before me with total overwhelming emotion weither it be joy, peace, stress, sadness, or an unknown emotion where I am just stricken still in my steps and without knowledge of my next step to take. It is amazing in each instance how moments, hours, days, months, or years pass and all of the sudden you flash back to the moment you stood still. Suddenly you realize how if you had never stood in that one place you would never have walked so far as you have now and what a blessing those steps have been. These reflections just constantly remind me when I doubt how I should instead trust, when I cry how I should instead pray, and when I lose control how I should know there is a bigger picture I do not know controlled by a higher power I know so well that holds us in His arms and surrounds us with His angels.
One moment I recall as a standing still in tears moment is now something that basically smacks me in the face because of how beautifully it all turned out. I wanted to share and hope it encourages someone that needs it today.
Five years ago I ended a phone call that was so important to me and started to bawl. I had built up so much anxiety about it, planned the conversation so extensively, made notes, and prayed, but the call did not go as I planned and hoped for. I had just given birth to our first little one. He was all I wanted to focus on. I asked if I could work at least part of the time from my home office. Understandibly, the response was no to keep things fair among co-workers, but i knew then for me I had to make a change. Five years later I am a full time at home mom working part time from my home office. Homeschooling my sweet five year old and feeling so blessed beyond words. I did not know God's plan, but i can say His plan was more perfect than I ever dreamed in my mind when I made my own plans.
I pray that your hearts desires are answered and you hear His voice when He directs you in His path. He always has His arms around us and knows more perfectly than us what is best. I thank Him for that beyond any words I can say that do it justice.
Sweet dreams and blessings to you and your families.